Tuesday, April 21, 2009

I fell off the wagon

I've been doing it again, while I am trying to consciously not talk about my body, that seems not to apply to my inner dialogue. It doesn't seem to apply to the numerous articles I have been reading online about people loosing weight or body image or the myriad of other related topics. While in part it seems difficult not to because just seems like it is every where I turn and other times I seek it out.

I suppose it is difficult not to do since I have been pity partying for the last three days. And nothing is more unattractive than a pity party. It is a funk that I can't shake, which just leads back to old habits.

Perhaps it is just change that I am craving, but I can't figure out what sort of change I want to make in my life. I mean there is the obvious big change that is happening with the move to the NYC. But that just still seems big picture enough that even all the small steps I am taking to don't seem like real changes.

I need immediate change now, change in my mindset, change in my routine. Something that gets me out of this funk, helps me regain my confidence and go back to the self-loving person I was merely a few weeks ago


Lloyd Dobler: Why can't you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?"
Constance: Gee, it's easy.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

An open letter

Dear those who attended the Lily Allen concert on Monday,


I have never been to a show before with so many rude people. It was as if a crowd of a couple hundred people had all never been to a concert before and had no concept of concert etiquette.

If you are approximately 7ft tall you do not come and stand directly in front of my under 5ft friend. You can see over everyone, stand in the back.

If you are too drunk to function, repeatedly hit on the same girls, do the above action, do us a favor and just go home. You ruined parts of the experience as I am spending time thinking of ways I could hit/punch/kick you without getting kicked out of the show or missing my favorite song.

Please do not sing at the top of your lungs in an off key, nasally voice. I did not pay $27 to hear you sing, I paid for Lily Allen. There are appropriate times to sing loud and proud at shows, an acoustic song when the whole venue is super quiet is not one of those times.

If you wanted to be at the front of the stage for the show, then get there early. Don't expect to have a good spot right as the set is beginning. Subsequently do not push past me, causing me to loose my spot with you and 6 of your friends expecting to get any closer. Split up or stand in a place where all of you fit. Don't make the rest of us squished because you didn't plan ahead.

Finally, PLEASE DO NOT HAVE ALMOST SEX IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CROWD. If you wanted to spend the whole time making out and humping each other, put the Lily Allen CD on and stay at home. You are very distracting and all that PDA is unnecessary.

As Lily Allen would say:

Fuck you, fuck you very very much