MyDeathSpace?*

Doing my best to stay aware of the current events, I came across this article in the Seattle Times today. I don't know how to react to it. In a way it is just the modern form of a cemetery, a place to remember the dead. It keeps people connected to those who died before they should have, maybe even helps create some closure. But I can't also help but wonder if it keeps us stuck in the past. Constantly remembering the person who died and what they are missing out on and what we are missing out on is not exactly that healthy. We can still live our lives, have fun and without that constant reminder that someone isn't with us. It is what you are supposed to do isn't it?
While I, like a lot of people (obviously), have some fascination with death, but is this too extreme? But then again it is other people's deaths, strangers, that I are sometimes more fascinating because once death hits close to home it isn't as interesting. It is devastating and hard to deal with and I don't think that I would want my friend, family member's death to always be there, always out there, reminding me that they are no longer around.

So, if I do die and still have my facebook and myspace accounts, delete them, remove them from the Internet. If you want to stay connected to me you'll figure out a less public way to do so.


*apologies for the morbid topic, just something that caught my eye

I just want to dance

This is an e-mail I sent The Seattlest in hopes that my plight makes to the masses:

Hey Seattlest,
This isn't a gripe about you, but I wanted to get my frustration out to the appropriate masses and you are one of my favorite forms of media. So if you could help get this out it would be awesome.

The moment I heard that Girl Talk was going to be at the Capitol Hill Block party I was exstatic. Overjoyed. Excited. And any other similar adjective. Having listen to his Night Ripper CD on repeat for days on end, to actually go to one of his shows was supposed to be awesome. But little did I know that I had to in line for Neumo's at least over three hours before his show started because if I didn't (as I later found out) I was not going to be able to get into the venue. So my friends and I enjoyed the atmosphere of the Block Party, which while a little overcrowded with pissed off hipsters, but that was still fine. Having lived on the Hill for four years I knew what I was getting into. We rocked out to Blue Scholars and Silversun Pickups. Ate free Popsicles and drank the free water Oasis was handing out. Chatted with the friendly people around us in the beer garden. Then after having a quick bite at the Pita Pit, we go back into the show with an hour and 15 mins. to spare before the whole reason of going to Block Party was to hit the stage. But to our horror, Neumo's had already reached capacity, they were having to send people out of the venue and the line of people that were for sure not going to get in, began with myself and a friend. Disappointed, to say the least we stayed in line dealing with the pushy girls behind us, the obscenely rude security guards, and all the while being able to see Mr. Girl Talk Himself, Gregg Gillis sit and drink his beer in the VIP area. Not wanting to draw attention to "our find" my friend and I just stared knowing that this was all of the show that we were going to see last night. After decided that it was a useless cause at this point and longing to meet our friends for drinks we left as Gregg was leaving to take the stage.

I am not letting this run my night, because otherwise it was good and fun. But it was frustrating because why didn't the event planners have him outside, where there was more space for everyone to see, move about and enjoy the show? Why even have the Neumo's stage actually set up? It is such a tiny venue to begin with that for a festival it is ridiculous to assume that it would be a good place bands to perform. Let this just be a forewarning for either tonight or for future block parties, but if you want to see anyone at that stage you need to get there early and stay there otherwise there is not chance of it happening.

Thanks,
Megan

Crazy news:

Okay in my successful attempts at procrastinating I cam across these two gems:

1) Two 12-yr-old girls wanted to cause an allergic reaction to their teacher to distract from their progress reports that were due. I guess this is better than them just pulling a prank on the teacher, but that there was an actual purpose to their cold heartedness

2) A girl was kicked off her flight for coughing too much. Its not like we are in a freakin' SARS epidemic anymore or some other "scary" disease of the week. The girl was coughing, and while I am sure it would have been annoying to hear, I don't think anyone on that flight feared for their own health

We interupt your bit of insomnia for this important bulletin:

THERE ARE NO COOKIES IN MY HOUSE

I mean it, there are no cookies. When has my house ever been completely cookie free? Even in the Weight Watchers days there was at least "heathy" cookies. Now, there are none and the one time that I actually wanted some and we are cookie free.

And let me tell you a non-frosted strawberry pop tart is not the same thing

It is the beginning of the end

Well, I think I did one of the scariest things of my life (well my life so far), which was registering for my last quarter of college classes. It was very anti-climatic and I got into all my classes on the first try, which I don't think ever happens. But there it is said and done. But as someone said to me last night, "If I was you I would be scared, I have a year and quarter to go and I am already worrying about what I am going to do. " Which of course I am scared, but at least I know that I am hiding it well, if she couldn't tell. But it is all that I think about, all the time. It trumps most other thoughts (minus all the work I need to get done to pass this quarter) and it makes it real difficult to balance looking at the big picture and the small picture at the same time.
Not much else to really comment on. I think this past Tuesday was the first Tuesday in a long time that I wasn't stressed at all during layout and really I should have been. Maybe its all part of my new thing that apparently I don't stress out when I should and instead I just sleep. Good Job self, good job

"no guys, we want more per pounds, we want to pack it on"

What to write about, what to write about? So much has happened in the last few days it seems impossible to comment on it all in a coherant entry. So we'll do the cliff notes version:

• Britney shaved her head and got ridiculous tattoos. Not much more is needed to be said here, except for the fact that she is making K-Fed look not as trashy which was hard to to do since he was the epitome of trash.
• "Ghost Rider" was number one at the box office. "Ghost Rider" come on now people, in what realm did that even look like movie? Yeah sure Eva Mendes is attractive, but should her hot factor account for $40+ million in ticket sales? I know that I like some pretty bad movies, but even I have to draw the line.
• Speaking of movies, "Bridge to Terabethia" was number two at the box office and contrary to other rumors it is true to the book and Leslie does die at the end. As it does appear that the trailers are misleading and that it does follow the book pretty well. So I want to see it, but that probably won't happen until it comes on video, but I digress. On some of the message boards about the movies, people were complaining about that fact that Leslie does die at the end and that Disney movies are supposed to be happy and also that the death and religious aspects were too deep for children to handle. What? I get that kids are growing up faster than necessary sometimes, but death isn't something that they need to be sheltered from, especially when it is done so tastefully in this film and book. Its not like Disney movies are perfect anyway, they are sexist, stereotypical and violent (doesn't mean I still don't love them). I just think of it as a great way to teach children about death, that is still abstract enough that it is something they don't have to actually go through, but can use the film as catharsis.
• THIS JUST IN: BANANA REPUBLIC NOW OFFERS CLOTHES IN DOUBLE ZEROES! Well thank goodness, because you don't know how big my zeroes were on me. Now, I know that there are some people are naturally skinner and everything, but really that skinny, so skinny you wear a size that is a double digit of a number that ulitimately means nothing. It just seems to be encouraging unhealthy body image and eating habits. There is nothing wrong with being skinny if that is how your body is built, just like there is nothing wrong with being an 8 or 14 as long as you are healthy about it.
• Last one, but personal pet peeve, people who use the handicap button to open then door when they don't need to and then subsequently cause the door to be open for a good ten seconds letting in a whole shitload of cold air and seem oblivious to it.

signs

So on my walk to school on a wall I would see this spray-painted stenciled picture of a heart with wing-esque types things coming from it and it said "c'est la vie." It was always sort of inspiring in a way. Sometimes I would specifically look for it and others I would forget it was there, but would happen to look at that wall when I would walk by. I had always meant to take a picture of it as well, but the one day I had my camera with me and remember the picture, I didn't. I was running late and thought that it would be there for awhile. But I should have just taken its advice and taken a picture that day, because when I was looking for it today, it wasn't there. The day I needed it to remind me "such is life" it is not there. I was looking for it to provide the obivous sign that it had been all those times before.
But maybe it was providing a sign, maybe the fact that it had been painted over it is a message for me to not accept "such is life" and that I need to step out of my easily controlled comfort zone. That I need to let go a bit and go with the flow.
I CAN'T GO WITH THE FLOW
This means not being in control, not knowing what will happen next, not being the one who is in the driver's seat. While I don't mind others making choices, I am a backseat driver and so I at least make sure I have my say in where we are going and how we get there.



Well, this is just too many symbols and metaphors for this early in the morning, I give up